Friday, April 14, 2006

How to mess wit de half chinee guyanese down de street...


The Definitive Crossing-over Test for the NRG (Non-Resident Guyanese)
How many of these points apply to you, a NRG?

  • Yuh start "chatting" instead of "gaffing", an yuh "hangin' out" instead of limin'".
  • Yuh feelin' embarrassed to "crash" a party.
  • Yuh eatin' roti with knife and fork.
  • Yuh start mekkin road signals when yuh drivin'.
  • Yuh cyan tek even slight pepper in yuh food.
  • Yuh stop tinkling de ice in yuh drink before yuh drink it.
  • Yuh have problems "sucking yuh teeth" when someone annoys you.
  • Yuh stop eatin' sugar cake, fudge, and tambran balls, because dey have "too many calories". (Oh my!)
  • Yuh worried dat the red stuff in "red mango" not good fuh ya.
  • Yuh not usin' expressions like: "Aunty Man", and "Don' tek yuh eyes an pass me".
  • Yuh fin' dat de wedda "too hot for me".
  • Yuh 'fraid to "laugh out loud", because people might "look at yuh funny".
  • Yuh drinkin' coconut water from a straw (Oh Lord! No, Not dat!).
  • U start sayin "excuse me" instead of "move u raas"
  • "Basin" becomes "container".
  • "It's over there", replaces "look e dey dey".
  • "Curass fish" now pronounced as "curbamsie".
  • U don't buy "bangamary", only "cod".
  • U stop laffin at people wid big foot and old men wid goady. (Me caan spel dat wan).
  • U usin blender instead o grater.
  • U does ring doorbell instead o standin on d road shoutin fu "inside"
  • (Thanks Spammin' Auntie)

    If you identify with more than four of the above statements, then, you have officially "crossed over". You might as well just bun de Guyana passport.

    5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!