Monday, September 19, 2005

The truth is out there - you need help

I've noticed that many web loggers are using their pages as platforms to sensitise the public to the plight of those in sundry dire straits. You know what I mean, humanitarian-type crap. Well, I just re-did the layout so there's no way I'm sticking any "this poor sod needs a hook-up" banners in; but a post, well, that costs me nothing and I might even score some karmic points out of the deal.

America, Vernon Wayne Ball needs your help. Here is his story:
In September of 1994, at 2119 Plum Street, Terre Haute, Indiana, this government, through technology with voices, subliminal messages, mind control and telepathy, brainwashed, scrambled my thought pattern and brain teased me, because I would not obey their commands. I was placed into a hypnotic state of being which caused several suicide attempts, incarceration and the loss of my career, as a tree climber.
Read on...
I filed a grievance to George Bush, according to our constitution (article one). He will not confirm, or deny such technology in use, today.

So, I'm wondering if anyone else has been victimized by this technology? If you have any information, please contact me. I know there must be many others "out there" that have suffered, as the result of this technology...
Now I can't help poor Vernon out with his grievance; because, well, I'm not American and I've never had my brain telepathically teased; but I have a suggestion. It sounds like Vernon needs one of those aluminium foil hats.

Go to AFDB homeNow, I've posted about these marvels before, but obviously Vernon didn't notice. Understandable, he's got issues. An enterprising fellow named Lyle Zapato has put together a helpful how-to page to aid in construction of aluminium foil deflector beanies, just like the one shown in the graphic. At very least Vernon will be able to stave off a repeat of the 1994 incident.

A final reminder; in order to ensure maximum reflectivity to psychotronic radiation and other nuisances; always use foil, shiny side out!

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!